after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
