considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
