We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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