Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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