I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
