I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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