well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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