check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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