eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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