So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
