Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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