That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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