I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
