no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
