What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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