there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
It's shark week go big or go home
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
A+ Viking dick
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
