You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
