i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
