One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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