Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
