I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
