then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
