I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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