She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
