Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
