so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
