That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
