I should be sponsored by Trojan
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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