Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
