I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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