you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
