I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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