All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
