I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
