that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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