Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
