watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
