We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
