how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
