Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I just want nice things and good sex
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
