I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
