I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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