They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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