Pants 0. Shit 1.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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