I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Let's paint friendship bongs
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
