...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Randomize
