I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
We left an ass print on the piano.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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