i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
either way he was missing a nipple.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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