oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Randomize
