I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
